Why do people smoke?

Some time ago, I stepped outside to enjoy a cigar between rains, storms and clouds. After a heavy rain, everything smells a little damp and the droplets of water that are coating everything catch the light. It was real nice out and I wasn’t the only one enjoying it.

An older couple was out walking their dog, and right as I lit up they stopped and the woman asked me if I knew that smoking kills.

No fucking shit, I said. Well not actually, I replied that I was aware of the risks, assuming that they would drop it and leave me to my smoke in peace.

Nope. Extra nosey neighbors is just one of the many joys of living in the Communist Republic of California (I kid, mostly). She wanted to know why I smoke if I know it could kill me.

It’s a fair question, but the answer isn’t any of her damn business. Family and friends, acquaintances even might get a real answer from me. Complete strangers intruding on my pristine Padron 3000? I told them that was my concern, not theirs. Praise the Lord, they fucking left.

 

I smoke the occasional cigar… because I fucking want to. I smoke them because I enjoy it. I smoke for the same reason I’m not a vegetarian, the same reason I watch football on Sunday and hit the gym with a vengeance six days a week.

I’ve seen all of the PSAs. I know all about the dangers. Cancer here, cancer there, cancer fucking everywhere. But smoking a few cigars each month isn’t like a pack a day habit in my mind, so the benefits far outweigh the risks.

And if you’re a pack-a-day man who always has his Marlboro Reds handy? Well I tip my hat to you, sir. It seems like everybody on the planet has the right to judge you if you want to light up some tobacco, or chew it for that matter. But can we judge the millions of Americans who are overweight when we see them lining up for some fast food?

No, that’s just insensitive.

If you enjoy being fat, or you enjoy food enough that the price you pay (being fat) is worth it to you as long as you can enjoy yourself – then so be it. If you like to smoke, the same principle applies. It’s your fucking life, and if you consciously choose to live the way you do then I’ve got respect.

But if you want to quit smoking but just cant find the strength, or you’re desperate to lose weight but keep falling off your diet plan so you quit on it? No respect for you, not for quitting on what you want.

 

Seize what you want with a vengeance. If it’s a new body, then go out there and conquer it. If it’s a cheeseburger then make it the biggest, baddest, baconcoatedest cheeseburger on the planet. If it’s a cigarette, smoke that fucker down to the hilt. If it’s what you really want, take it. Its yours.

 

 

Moto Book of the Month – August

The Meditations of Marcus Aurelius

This book is difficult for me to describe succinctly. It’s had a tremendous impact on my life and I honestly no longer remember the number of times I’ve read it. Especially the first book (it is subdivided into twelve parts, or books).

These are quite literally, the meditations of Marcus Aurelius. He writes his own private thoughts about duty and the meaning of life, reminds himself to stay true to his values, to be a good man, to be humble, to give thanks to everyone and everything that formed him. He writes as a man, as a Roman and as an emperor who has doubts, questions and who struggles with his existence and attempts to remain stoic in the face of that internal dissonance – both on a philosophical level, and on a simpler human level.

While there is some discussion of his life, this is far from a biography and I have found his writing and perspective to be extremely enlightening and comforting during difficult times.

If I could read only one book for the rest of my life, it might very well be this one.

You can find an online copy here, courtesy of MIT (there is also a link to a text only version).

Amazon also has several different editions available, some of them for very little (I bought this one recently for a couple bucks).

Fighting the Good Fight – Like a Man

It’s uncomfortable, but yesweman is going to talk about race in America. We’re not going to shy away from uncomfortable conversations – that’s cowardice and cowardice is distinctly unmanly.

Also, because I’m such a narcissist we’re gonna talk about me. And you. And as always, being a man.

Why yesweman exists

Across the country I see a sort of dilapidated state of manhood. It frustrates and concerns me to see values like integrity, honor, and courage become more and more scarce in the men around me.

While my take is often lighthearted – sarcastic even – this is always the root concern of this website. I often avoid a more serious discussion of the subject because many other places do so, arguably better than I could.

Being a “man” is sometimes a ridiculous proposition, weighed down by decades of crusty stereotypes and tired clichés. It’s ripe for criticism and humor. However, even after we consider the ridiculousness associated with manliness, it’s still important. It’s important to our families, our communities and our country. Because of this I struggle to identify the correct tone for this place and also for my own views.

That’s one of the main reasons I haven’t posted anything I’ve written since January, I haven’t been able to pin down the best way to approach an issue that has any number of takes and viewpoints. Until recently, that is.

Recent events, specifically those in Charleston, have convinced me of a few things.

First, it’s reaffirmed what we all knew all along – there is a growing shortage of good, strong and honorable men in this country.

Secondly it’s convinced me that I’ll never be satisfied watching on the sidelines as that shortage gets worse year by year. I’ve got to speak my mind on this subject – even if I sound like a dinosaur to some and a “cuck” to others. As a man, I can do no less.

Third, it convinced me that yesweman can and should have the depth to be both humorous and deadly serious at the same time. The absolute cowardice, dishonor, perversion of American ideology, and utter disgrace to manhood that was on display in Charleston is both of those things. It is a deadly, serious, grave concern to see white supremacy and fascist ideology embraced by “American” “men”.

At the same time, watching obese “militiamen” who barely had the stamina to stand in their tacticool gear (let alone fight) and wannabe tough-guys dressed up to look like a Nazi Geek Squad (sorry BestBuy) is also hilarious. I mean, they were ridiculous.

Be a man, not a racist

Yesweman is about being a fucking man. At the end of the day we all have to decide what that means for ourselves – don’t take my word as gospel, nobody elected me pope.

What it means to me though, is that I handle my shit. I take care of the people around me. I fight my own weaknesses and fears, do my damndest to be grateful and give thanks, I strive to show compassion to those around me, to work hard – like a demon, to better myself at every opportunity and adhere to my own personal core values. And eat bacon.

It also means I don’t judge another man, woman or child by the way they look, language they speak, or god(s) they do or do not worship. I don’t look in the mirror and see superiority because my skin is pale – I see room for improvement and nothing else. Above all, I don’t stand by quietly while my fellow Americans face injustice, discrimination, overt hatred and racism. I don’t keep my mouth shut or mind my own business.

Being a man means that I fight the good fight because that’s the right thing to do, the man thing do to.

 

 

Training motivation: Can you bench more than a 15 year old girl?

Well, it depends on the girl.

Maryana Naumova is a Russian powerlifter who has bench pressed in excess of 255 lbs raw.

Go ahead and take a look.

Embarassed? You should be.

I know some of you will take issue with the form she uses, particularly in the video I’ve linked to. Others might point out the somewhat short pause at the bottom of the lift. Those are, in my opinion, valid criticisms. Until you remember that this isn’t a 200lb grown man – its a teenage girl. Most men couldn’t come close to finishing that lift – regardless of the pause or the form.

255 lbs is definitely an above average lift for a grown man. Granted, this is mostly due to the fact that the majority of men don’t visit the gym at all, and of those that do roughly half have no fucking idea what they’re doing. But, suppose for a second we ignore that and live in a better world where men everywhere hit the iron with a vengeance on the regular.

255lbs is still a respectable feat of strength for a man. And there’s a teen girl who can bench it.

Next time you’re going to bitch out and skip training, ask yourself if you’re really okay with being weaker than a fifteen year old girl.

Prodigy or not, she was still a teenage girl. Time to get pressing fellas.

 

 

A worthy goal for every man to achieve – 500lb deadlift

If I could only do one exercise for the rest of my life, it would be a toss up between the deadlift and the squat. Both are serious compound movements that stimulate muscles across the entire body, and require serious mental discipline to master.

Many men shy away from the deadlift because they’re afraid of it and claim that deadlifting will screw up your back. That’s a load of crap if you’re smart. It’s an exercise that can really and truly fuck you up if you don’t respect it and use strict form, but if you maintain a sensible progression (don’t start out trying to pull 500 lbs) there’s no reason that men who have healthy backs should worry. In fact, deadlifting properly is one of the best movements for strengthening your lower back muscles. That in turn can help stave off injury and soreness from bad posture.

Like all of the goals we discuss, a 500lb deadlift is not something you will achieve overnight. While professional powerlifters can often lift almost double this amount, for the untrained it’s a feat of strength that will likely take a couple years of dedicated strength training to achieve. Proper diet and training will no doubt accelerate the process, but don’t expect to start deadlifting tomorrow and be pulling anywhere near 500lbs several months later.

Aside from that feeling of accomplishment, a man who can deadlift 500lbs will also have a strong back, crushing grip and will enjoy the higher testosterone levels that accompany performing a heavy compound movement on a regular basis.

500 lbs wont make you the strongest most badass guy in the gym, but it will earn you that guys respect. Most men don’t go to the gym, most who do don’t deadlift and most who do deadlift never get up above 300-400lbs.

How American Men can Live More

How American Men can live 11% more.

Nope, that’s not a typo. Today I’m going to tell you how American men can all live 11% more.

In 2013 the Bureau of Labor Statistics released a report on how Americans spend their time, and the results we’re absolutely shocking. No, cancel that.

They were pathetic.

On a weekday, your average American man spends 2.69 hours watching TV. On weekends that number increases to 3.67. That means American men are spending more than 11% of their time (you do the math, divide 2.69 by 24 hours in a day) each week of the year sitting on their asses in front of the TV.

Now I’ll grant you that a case could be made that watching TV is living. Obviously in the literal sense, but also figuratively, TV is fun and entertaining and film is the “American art form”. Right?

My problem isn’t with watching TV. I mean, yeah we’re doing too much of it and we should cut that crap out but that’s a topic for another paragraph. My problem is with watching almost three hours of TV every single day.

Let’s begin with the ads. Every hour you spend watching TV is actually only about 45 minutes long. The other fifteen minutes belong to advertisers. That means if you watch for three hours a day, you’re spending 45 minutes of your day every single day watching boner pill ads. No wonder so many men have erectile issues! If you do it every single day for the rest of your life, you will have spent greater than three percent of your time on this planet watching commercials.

Three whole percent of your entire life. Gone. Don’t even try to argue that chunk of time spent watching commercials is life well lived, that argument is horseshit and you know it.

You could have spent that three percent of your life traveling, talking to your kids or your spouse or your imaginary friend, Jim, or learning a new skill or hobby. You could have spent three extra percent of your life fucking. Literally, really, truly fucking. Hell, you could’ve spent that time rubbing one out and it still would’ve been better used. You could have spent that extra three percent of your life cooking and eating bacon. Really fellas, think about the many tradeoffs here.

And let’s rewind because I’m not conceding that bullshit point earlier about TV watching being a worthwhile endeavor for that amount of time even without the ads.

Let me paint you a picture. You wake up on Saturday morning, make breakfast and plop down to watch “a little” television while you eat. Six hours later you don’t remember deciding to spend all day watching college football but you did. And you don’t recall getting up to grab the Doritos, but your hands are covered in cheese dust.

Feel like a man in that moment? No, of course not. You feel like a kindergartener. No self-discipline. No self-control. Not an ounce of manhood in that entire experience.

The solution to this, like most of the problems we face today, is to take control of your life.

Ask some hard questions gents.

Who’s running things, you or your remote control?

Are you turning on the TV because you want to watch something specific (the news, a specific football game, a particular TV show or movie), or are you hitting the button out of pure reflex and you’ll “find something”?

Does it really give you joy, or do you turn it on to hide from your work, chores or other problems?

Are you proud of the amount of TV you watch? If you had a son, would you want him to spend his time the way you do? Does it fulfill you, spending that big a chunk of your life staring at a screen?

Let’s recap with those numbers, which again, are averages. Some of you watch even more.

11% of your entire life is spent watching television.

3% of your entire life is spent watching the commercials.